The recent passing of my father has caused me to reflect on my childhood. As a grown woman I am reminded the depth of joy and pain parenting can have and how this stays with us forever.
My heart has been flooded with many emotions and as I process each emotion memories good and bad about my father come to the front of my mind. He had been typical of his generation, worked and left parenting up to my mother. Included in my grief right now in my heart is what I didn’t have with him and will never have and this hurts.
This brings me to now as a parent. I don’t want my children to be at my death bed one day grieving what I never gave them or how I hurt them. Many years ago as a Palliative Care Nurse, I witnessed so much pain and disharmony between parents and children which exploded out in those final days and hours. Like I have said many times, the power of parenting is very real and your actions can last a life time. Decades down the track and the lack of action my own father took in my childhood is a part of me. Our actions on our children can be stored within them for life. I want to give my children a childhood that they don’t have to recover from in years to come. I am trying not to follow negative patterns that I learnt from my parents. I am not a perfect parent but I am a work in progress trying to be a better one.
If you can relate to pain and hurts from your own childhood and don’t want the same for your children join me in my quest to parent supporting your child’s emotional wellbeing. Parenting from your child’s point of view. How would it feel to be on the receiving end of your words, your tone, and your actions? Are you an instructional parent? Are you too over bearing, controlling, bossy, authoritarian, ridiculing, intolerant, angry, or trying to repress them?
No one is perfect but sometimes our own emotional baggage can affect the way we respond and act especially if our buttons are pushed. It’s time for us to grow emotionally, to find freedom from our hurts and not pass them onto our children through negative actions.
With a fire in my belly, I want to inspire other parents to have more awareness of their actions, to grow themselves and to grow their children into confident, independent young individuals so they can cope with what is in front of them.
As I continue to work on myself personally, on my parenting approach and always evolving I hope I can provide a childhood for my children that gives them the skills to cope with the trials and tribulations of life.
If this resonates with you and you are ready to change for the benefit of you and your children, connect with me for counselling and coaching at firstname.lastname@example.org Face to face and Skype consultations available.